We live in a world of highlight reels, filters, and perfect captions. And with all that comes, an incredible amount of pressure to look happy and put together at all times.
There’s a name for this relentless pressure: toxic positivity. It's this insistence that we all pretend like everything is okay, all the time, even when it isn't.
A little while back, I led an activity with our high school group about this exact phenomenon. We started by writing down the specific expectations they feel: be a top student, a standout athlete, endlessly organized. But then we flipped the script and admitted the other side by anonymously writing down a failure. Next, we shuffled all of these expectations and failures into a March-Madness–style bracket and, round by round, talked honestly about which failure was worst, and which pressure was strongest.
It was a bit silly but also deeply sacred at the same time. By the end of this weird activity, we could all see it: expectations are sky-high, and every one of us falls short sometimes. We expect a lot of ourselves and yet all of us fail in often spectacular ways.
And of course, the really message of our faith is that Jesus steps right into all of this. Jesus steps into our messy human existence and redeems all of it. And he did this by dying on the cross.
The theology of the cross is the exact opposite of Toxic Positivity. The cross is God's way of showing us that we don’t have to paste a smile over sorrow or go on pretending like we aren't struggling. Through the Cross of Christ, God abides with us in failure, fear, and grief—and from these spaces brings healing.
There’s a name for this relentless pressure: toxic positivity. It's this insistence that we all pretend like everything is okay, all the time, even when it isn't.
A little while back, I led an activity with our high school group about this exact phenomenon. We started by writing down the specific expectations they feel: be a top student, a standout athlete, endlessly organized. But then we flipped the script and admitted the other side by anonymously writing down a failure. Next, we shuffled all of these expectations and failures into a March-Madness–style bracket and, round by round, talked honestly about which failure was worst, and which pressure was strongest.
It was a bit silly but also deeply sacred at the same time. By the end of this weird activity, we could all see it: expectations are sky-high, and every one of us falls short sometimes. We expect a lot of ourselves and yet all of us fail in often spectacular ways.
And of course, the really message of our faith is that Jesus steps right into all of this. Jesus steps into our messy human existence and redeems all of it. And he did this by dying on the cross.
The theology of the cross is the exact opposite of Toxic Positivity. The cross is God's way of showing us that we don’t have to paste a smile over sorrow or go on pretending like we aren't struggling. Through the Cross of Christ, God abides with us in failure, fear, and grief—and from these spaces brings healing.
Posted in theology of the cross
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2026
January
365: Spiritual Practices You Can Do - St. Ignatius ExamenHymn Reflection - God of Love, O King of PeaceThe Book of Deuteronomy - Establishing CommunityThe Epiphany of Our LordRated PG: Thoughts on Isaiah 58The Unexpected Ways of God: Mistakes Epiphany Rising Stars - Guidance365: Spiritual Practices You Can Do - Lectio DivinaEpiphany Rising Stars - InspirationThe Book of Joshua - God Keeps the PromiseThe Baptism of Our LordRated PG: Thoughts on Jeremiah 29:7The Unexpected Ways of God: Prayer365: Spiritual Practices You Can Do - Centering PrayerThe Book of Judges - Abundant MercyRated PG: Thoughts on Matthew 5New BeginningsEpiphany Rising Stars - SeasonsEpiphany Rising Stars - Knowledge of Love365: Spiritual Practices You Can Do - Prayer JournalingEpiphany Rising Stars - ChangesEpiphany Rising Stars - AweThe Book of Ruth - Challenging our AssumptionsStewardship SermonUnconditional LoveThe Unexpected Ways of God: FeastEpiphany Rising Stars - God Hold's the Future365: Spiritual Practices You Can Do - The Jesus PrayerEpiphany Rising Stars - Beautiful SaviorThe Book of Ecclesiastes – Finding Meaning in God
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Fourth Sunday after EpiphanyEpiphanies For Epiphany - GraceThe Unexpected Ways of God: SuprisesEpiphanies For Epiphany - Sanctification365: Spiritual Practices You Can Do - GratitudeEpiphanies For Epiphany - Law & GospelThe Book of Philippians - Hope in Times of TroubleThe Fifth Sunday after Epiphany Epiphanies For Epiphany - CreationThe Unexpected Ways of God: Sports MoviesEpiphanies For Epiphany - Trinity365: Spiritual Practices You Can Do - Seasons, Rituals, and TraditionsEpiphanies For Epiphany - FaithThe Book of Song of Solomon – Love as a Reflection of God’s FaithfulnessThe Sixth Sunday after EpiphanyEpiphanies For Epiphany - SilenceThe Unexpected Ways of God: Niagara FallsThe Season of Lent365: Spiritual Practices You Can Do - Daily Life CuesUnlearning for Lent - I am what I accomplishThe Book of Isaiah - Hope in the Midst of JudgementThe First Sunday in LentHymn Devo - Lord of All HopefulnessYou Are SpecialUnlearning for Lent - I am what I accomplish CopyRated PG: Thoughts on Luke 4Unlearning for Lent - Performative Faith
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The Second Sunday in Lent Unlearning for Lent - Scarcity MindsetLet Go and Let God Unlearning for Lent - DespairHidden but Still ThereUnlearning for Lent - Silence as Absence The Book of Lamentations - Hope in the Midst of SufferingThe Third Sunday in LentUnlearning for Lent - The Need to Fix EveryoneHymn Devo - What a Fellowship, What a Joy DivineUnlearning for Lent - The Idol of Comfort365: Spiritual Practices You Can Do - Breath Prayer
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Zombie ChurchFundamentalsFeasts & BanquetsAcademics & FaithShattering Our ExpectationsJesus didn't really mean that, right? Sacred Discomfort: How God Speaks in Uncomfortable MomentsThe Spirit IntercedesHappy Birthday JesusChristmas in JulyJoy in ListeningHope in the Midst of DoubtThe Gift of PresenceI'm too...Daily Bread and MindfulnessA Thousand Years is like a DaySacred Interruptions: How God Speaks Through Life's Detours
March
The Life was The Light of All PeopleWaiting PatientlyUnseenCreator God, I pray for the earth...God, I want to be better at...Holy Spirit, Help me UnderstandGod, Grant Me Patience WithThe Gospel of John - Guidance for LifeJesus Christ, Forgive Me ForThe Book of 1st Samuel - Trust During the BattlesGod of the Oppressed, protect those who are vulnerableEnduring Lord, I hope forPrince of Peace, Calm my Mind When...
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